More and more women admit that they look at the ceiling while making love. If some are disappointed with their partner and give up, others take the initiative to spice it up!
"I've been bored in bed for a long time, made an effort not to yawn and even pretended to enjoy it to finish faster," says Karine, 32, a mother of twins. "After a long day of work, the little ones come home from school, I help them with their homework, prepare food, etc. so my only desire after that kind of a day is to have six hours of uninterrupted sleep."
For Sandrine Atallah, sexologist and sex therapist, everyone feels desire, man or woman. "In our modern life, more and more negative factors are affecting women's desire both in the West and in our Lebanese society. In general, the modern working woman who considers that she has to be satisfied with only one partner faces many pressures. First of all, the lack of seduction, of variety, and let's not forget all the stress, the fact that she has children and household chores that await her after her long day of work. The modern woman is therefore too exhausted and preoccupied to have her mind set on sex all the time. All these factors lessen her desire and will most definitely affect negatively the couple's sex life."
For the sexologist, the couple is a human and cultural invention. "The human being by biological nature is not monogamous. Studies show that yes, women need variety. Those who choose to be in a long-term relationship must invest in their sexuality to make the couple last. " Each person must find a balance in their relationship, depending on the expectations of both partners, their investment in their sexuality." You also have to be realistic and know that it's normal to desire someone outside the couple. If you have made the choice to be in a relationship, you have to invest in it and work on it because it's not a natural form, "insists the sexologist.
How? A woman should make love for herself, not for marital duty or because she has to. And instead of censoring oneself in bed, women should focus on their own pleasure. "The problem in our Eastern society is that woman should not desire before marriage, as if after her wedding day, the desire will magically appear! This is impossible since she's become used to not wanting, not desiring, and since the desire always had a negative connotation,"reveals the expert. "The woman should be familiar with the sexual act that is beyond reproduction, and in a perspective of couple intimacy, complicity, emotions, sensuality and reunion."