Is it okay to date your best friend's ex?
Have you ever wondered if “bros before hoes” or “sisters before misters” didn’t have to apply all the time? Let’s put it like this: you realize just now that you have feelings for a guy you’ve known for years. But there’s one problem: he’s your best friend’s ex! What should you do? Should you back off or should you just go where destiny takes you and possibly ruin your friendship?
“Unless you are trapped on a desert island and the future of civilisation depends on you, it's not a good idea,” says dating coach Rachel DeAlto. She continues: “dating a friend's ex likely destroys the trust and the relationship you have with that friend. The times where these options are truly worth it are few and far between.” In other words, dating your friend’s ex can be a bloody disaster.
But what if your friend is actually okay with it? What if you’ve got his/her blessing?
Well, unless your friend is now happily married with a bunch of kids, we can never be fully certain that the whole “blessing” is sincere. They could be hiding their frustration by letting you date their ex just to show you they’re not desperate over the latter, they may want to show you they’ve moved on even though they haven’t. And if they actually have moved on, it’s possible that the whole “dating the ex” thing is just weird and uncomfortable for them.